Night Talks | Stress and Self-adjusting
In the past few weeks, our students have gone through baptism of various mid-term exams. While trying to cope with heavy academic works, they are also subject to the intensity of daily social pressure, which, if left unattended and unmanaged, would gradually ferment into anxiety.
The guest of this Night Talk introduced many useful psychological tips to our students. From the perspective of psychology, anxiety is the result of conflict between the external pressure and one’s emotional endurance within. When asked about the best ways of dealing with pressure, the majority of participants chose to speak or vent it out, which, in fact, are the correct methods. Professor Zou then concluded by saying that the basic way of dealing with pressure is to externalize it. Drawing on Freud’s theory, externalization is the attempt to project pressure stored on subconsciousness to consciousness, and failing to do so, would result in a prolonged accumulation of emotions that will ultimately lead to depression. In the following section of an actual drill, every student received a piece of white paper on which they could write their recent troubles anonymously. Participants were then asked to express their opinions and solutions about their peers’ problems. At the end of the talk, Professor Zhou offered his own view for students’ reference.
Q1: What is the best state of mind in real life?
The state of mind is actually a more or less abstract and theoretic subject of which everyone has his or her own view. While some may say that a healthy emotional state should be both calm and resilient, not to fluster in face of unexpected events, some think that it is a state of comfortable vacuum. Another bunch of students pointed out, from another perspective, that good emotional wellbeing entails not only the ability to handle personal matters but also to influence others with positivity. Building on what he just told us about the origin of anxiety, Professor Zou then pointed out that a good emotional wellbeing must depend on one’s adaptability to environment. As the conflicts between our emotions and surrounding environments are exactly what make us prone to generate negative thoughts, a healthy state of mind will help us to face them in a calm and balanced way.
Q2: How do university students deal with the gap between ideal and reality?
Actually, a reshaping of one’s cognition about himself and enhancement of one’s confidence are needed to cope with such kind of problem. The unbalance between the past and future usually brings us many unwanted bothers. Each individual has his or her own strength. Although we all have heard the saying of comparing with ourselves rather than others, few of us could do so. For us, the most important thing is to live the present. We must not only distinguish for our present selves the things that we need, we can and we want to do, but also to make a reasonable assessment of ourselves upon completion. The disappointment between reality and ideal derives often from one’s over expectation of himself. In contrast to the bygone past and uncertain future, living and taking control of the present is what really counts. Another point worth mentioning is the theory of causality, which states there is always a cause for every effect. People have the freedom of consciousness to decide his choice in the present, which will become the cause for future consequence. This is why we should not neither belittle our own values nor obsess with others’.
Although the number of students on site was not a lot, they all had different issues. Some of them may regret about what they have done in the past, some may be anxious about their inability to deal with interpersonal conflicts, others may be confused and unconfident about their future. Despite such a varying array of problems, the mindset of solving those is identical. The whole process of discovering and solving problems is exactly what enriches our university life and experience. Diligentia College wishes each of its little elves to grow up with a positive mindset that remains calm in any adversity. If you are fixated on some problems, we, of course, will always be there for you with open arms and attentive ears.
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